repent

one of the best things living together with budak kecik is every night you can hear she recites the Holy Quran and none of the day this house lack of the sound of dzikir and all the beautiful sounds come from her laptop. such a tranquila. it feels like home. exactly like home. it's like my OH SO MACHO AND AMAZING DADDY is there with me every single day. i used to sneak up her room to watch her perform the solah. i just don't know why i don't have the courage to do so. please don't get me wrong. i'm trying so hard to do so as well. it's just not my best.

i just hope that the Al-Mighty have some mercy on me.

knot

not really looking for the exact.

Aisyah (The Prophet Muhammad's wife) once asked him: "How is your love for me?"

"Like the rope's knot," he replied meaning that it was strong and secure.

And time after time thereafter, she would ask him: "How is the knot?" and he would reply: "Ala haaliha in the same condition."

but at least, something close.

if

if i have a boyfriend, i will call him beautiful.

remember when i said language guy always turn me on?

you know what it feels like to fall in love with anonymous?

it feels so relief. why?

because you don't have to meet this person. especially if you both don't know each other.

he does not know about your existence nor you know about his real self.

and you know from the first place it won't happen. never. nunca.

i was in love. nope. i am still in love with this particular guy since i first read his blog two years ago. he is a teacher in some remote area in Sarawak. to me he such a good writer. he knows language very well and he surprisingly has a very pleasant look. not the handsome type of guy. but more to nerdy-i-enjoy-literature-so-much type. i've been spending my weekend browsing his blog reading his past post. i enjoy this label of his. seems like he understand or at least trying harder to understand Venusia. it so glad to know that actually there are some people out there who make some effort to try to understand the way we are. really. flower-flower, okey. by the way, please try to read The Gentle Sex. sure it'll bring a smile on your face. Cheerio!!!

p/s: going to miss Mr.Beego so much. though we don't know each other that well, at least he used to sleep next to Orca.

finger and nail

it's normal when your student is the one who said things like "cantik nya kuku teacher".

but when your married male colleague who said things like "cantik jari-jemari zila", creepy, right?

>rasa macam terganggu sikit emosi. di bulan ramadhan la pula.

i'd love to

I'd love to kill you with a kiss

I'd like to strike you down with bliss

I'd like to tie you up in knots

Until your heart stops

I'd love to kill you with a glance

I'd like to put you in a trance

I'd like to drug you with my scent

And use you in the moment, ooh

I'd love to kill you as you eat

The pleasure would taste so sweet

I'd like to open up your skin

And wander there within

I'd love to kill you by a stream

Where no one can hear my baby scream

And then I'd run away and be free

The sweetest victory, ooh

I love to watch you in your sleep

'Cause you don't have power over me

And when you're awake I'm undone

Under you spell in hell