i wonder when will i ever stop worrying about work. i know i seldom bring my work back at home. i usually settle everything up at school. i never bring students' exercise book at home. i will make time to check their work at school. i finish my lesson plan. people thought i have nothing to do at home other than watching movie, reading and sleeping as i always say. but actually i still think about work when i'm home. i'm teaching 5 form 3 classes. their future is in my hand. if they failed their English, i'm the one to be blame by Mr. Principal. it scare the hell out of me. what am i supposed to do? PMR is just around the corner and i know my students are not ready for it. i've been trying so hard preparing everything for them. drills, exercise, tests. still it leads nowhere. i'm going to be a dead meat. burn alive by the principal and the admin...;(
2. FINANCE
after almost 2 years of working, i still don't know how to manage my monthly expenses. i always over budgeting myself in everything. still can't live without daddy's money. daddy usually will give me 200-300 a month as a pocket money. that's not included my fuel and any expenses when i'm home in tawau. i have no saving. and what worse, i don't even know where the money gone. for God sake, they don't even have shopping mall here in sandakan. i guess i spent more in food and beverages. no wonder i'm such a fat cow. how am i suppose to solve this? i need a financial manager!!!
3. FEELING
huuuuuuhhhhhhhhh...a very big sigh. i hate how i feel right now. it's like there's a burden inside of me that i have to let go but i just don't know how. emotionally unstable. i just need someone to talk to, someone who can understand me. but i know once i meet this person, i wont talk. not even a single words. cause that's what i am. reserved. so just forget it.
i do flirt, a lot. but i never let things go beyond words. i will only go for someone i really like and i don't get one just for fun. i will wait for the one guy that is potentially the be all and end all.
God, help!!! mati.
